10/4/20

 You're getting a few long posts in a row cause I have a lot I wanna say today. Again, today was General Conference. I had invited Derity and Jerako and David over for the first session. I had been craving biscuits and gravy so I actually went out and got ingredients for it last night. David came over a little early and we made the breakfast for everyone! I definitely made a mistake in calculating how much milk to put in with the Bisquick mix for the biscuits. It said 2/3 cup for each serving and it had 8 servings. I did the math and I was like, "Okay that's 16/3 then so... 8 cups!" I didn't realize until the seventh cup when things got ultra liquidy that it was actually supposed to be 5 and 1/3 cups. Luckily I had a back up Bisquick box and we added more mix in. It was still more like a batter than it usually was but it had gotten fairly firm and so we just kept it that consistency and it actually ended up so good! They still came out really big but they were all airy and fluffy and so so good. The gravy worked out too and it all tasted heavenly. 

The sessions were really good again (obviously) and I feel like a major theme for this whole conference has been preparedness and selflessness. At least that's what I got out of it. So I started trying to think about what I could do in order to be more prepared. I decided that I really wanted to focus on serving others more. I have lots of extra journals so I want to designate one as my prayer journal and in my prayers at the beginning of the day ask the Lord what He needs me to do that day. I want to spend time after pondering and then writing down what I think I can do. At the end of the day I want to come back and make an accounting and continually strive to be better. I feel like I will certainly be a lot more prepared to receive personal revelation.

I've just felt a lot lately like now is the time to really work on myself. Work not only on becoming and being the kind of person I want to marry but also on becoming and being the kind of mother I hope to be. There's this one quote I found online before heading off to college. Things felt rough and my mental health was fragile. But this quote honestly brought me so much strength. It goes like this:

"In the end I am the only one who can give my children a happy mother who loves life." 

The more that I think about it and the more I think about the promptings I've been receiving lately the more I realize that this is kind of my life motto right now. THAT is what I want to do and I am the only one who can do it. Thinking of my future children and the life that I want for them is a big motivator for me.

Some fun things today though: Mira made chicken gnocchi soup for dinner, like the kind they have at Olive Garden, and it was literally the best thing every. What a good food day! Mira also had a ton of extra black construction paper so we spent a good amount of time cutting bats out of it to put up for Halloween decorations. I'll have to take a picture once it's all finished and on the walls and post it here.

(PS everybody else in my family has tested negative for COVID which is good but also not great cause they're still exposed to it and if they'd all just get sick at the same time then they could all be quarantined at the same time and just get the two weeks of quarantine out of the way.)